As noble as it is to do your best at caring for your elderly mother or father, no one ever tells you about the emotional burden that comes along.
The stress behind the whole process of monitoring food and meds, scheduling doctor’s appointments, and generally caring for your elder parent may lead to caregiver stress syndrome.
So if you’re feeling like you’re not doing your best or that there’s still more to be done to provide better service for your parents — pause, take a deep breath, and stop blaming yourself for being tired and stressed out.
It’s normal, and it’s bound to happen. Instead of blaming yourself, let’s discuss how to cope with the stress and try limiting it.
How Stressful Can Caring for an Elderly Parent Be?
Caring for an elderly parent can easily take a toll on you and negatively affect your physical and mental health. The issue is so common, it even has a name. All these feelings are signs of Caregiver Stress Syndrome.
4 Signs of Caregiver Stress Syndrome
- You often feel worried or overwhelmed.
- You disconnect from your friends and family.
- You lost interest in your favorite activities.
- You’re suffering from physical pain, such as chronic headaches, stomach upset, fatigue, or even weight loss.
How to Cope With the Stress
Caregiver Stress Syndrome can easily become a burden that weighs down your soul. You’ll always feel like you’re not doing enough for your elderly parents or that you don’t deserve some time off — but that’s not true.
The golden rule for helping someone is to take care of yourself first. Otherwise, you won’t be able to offer much help if you’re not in the best shape. So you need to prioritize your health and well-being to help your elderly parents.
7 Tips for Caring for Yourself and Your Elderly Mother or Father
Caring for your elderly mother or father can easily get out of hand. Before you know it, you’ll be burnt out and too tired to provide them with the necessary care.
If you’re not sure where to start, here’s a list of 7 helpful tips to help:
1. Prioritize Your Health and Well-being
Taking care of yourself should always come first. You can’t help anyone if your health is compromised. Your guilt will only grow bigger too, and that’s the opposite of what you need to do.
So every now and then when you feel drained, take a break and take some time for yourself. You deserve some of your care too, you know.
2. Ask for Help When You Need It
Many believe that they are the only person responsible for caring for their parents. It could be because they’re the eldest who’s always in charge, or the youngest one who still lives with them. It could even be because you both reside in the same neighborhood.
Whatever the reason is, it’s alright to ask for help. Call your siblings, cousins, or even friends, and ask them to help you. If all else fails, you could always hire a professional caregiver for your elderly parent to help free some time for yourself.
When you begin delegating and dividing your elderly parent’s responsibility with different people, it’ll become much lighter for everyone involved.
3. Allow Your Parent to Be Independent, If Possible
If your parent’s health condition allows it, let them be as independent as possible. Not only does it lessen the burden on your shoulders, but it also helps them maintain their physical and mental health.
Allow them to activate their brain cells and move their muscles as much as possible to stay in good shape and prevent muscle deterioration or loss of brain function.
4. Stay Healthy
As part of taking care of yourself, you need to make sure that you’re well and healthy, both physically and mentally. So don’t skip your regular check-ups and see a doctor when you feel sick.
Try to pick up some healthy habits and incorporate them into your daily life. Get enough sleep, stay hydrated, eat clean, and exercise regularly to stay in good shape. The healthier you are, the more care you’ll provide for your parents.
5. Talk About Feelings
We recommend you visit a therapist to help you work through the stress and provide you with the best coping mechanisms that suit you and your lifestyle.
If a therapist isn’t an accessible option, you could always talk to a friend or family member. Sharing your feelings with someone you trust helps take the weight off your chest, and you’ll feel so much better afterward.
6. Hire Professional Help
Caring for an elderly parent is already difficult, so get as much help as you need to make your life easier.
Schedule a cleaning professional to help keep your house clean, ask someone to help prepare food, or even call a professional caregiver to sit with your parents when you’re unavailable.
There’s nothing wrong with reaching out for help. On the contrary, you preserve your energy for more crucial tasks that only you can do.
7. Create Memories and Spend Quality Time With Your Elderly Parent
Remember that your time with them isn’t a job; it’s your life passing by. So try to make the most out of your time with your parents. If possible, have deep heart-to-heart conversations with them, play a fun game while sitting down, or maybe even paint a picture together.
Create fun memories and spend more quality time with them. It’ll make the time go by faster, and you’ll remember these fun memories in the future when they’re no longer around.
FAQs
1. What is Caregiver Stress Syndrome?
Caregiver Stress Syndrome is a term used to describe the physical, emotional, and mental strain that can affect individuals who are taking care of an elderly or ill family member, such as a parent.
2. How can I handle the stress when it feels like my elderly mother is consuming my life?
Prioritize your health, ask for help, allow your parent to be independent if possible, maintain healthy habits, share your feelings with trusted individuals, consider professional help, and remember to spend quality time creating memories with your parent.
3. Should I hire professional help when caring for my elderly mother?
Hiring professional help can be beneficial, particularly if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Professionals can assist with tasks such as cleaning, meal preparation, or even providing companionship for your parent when you’re unavailable.
4. can I maintain a healthy lifestyle while caring for my elderly parent?
Try to maintain a balanced diet, get regular exercise, stay hydrated, ensure you’re getting enough sleep, and don’t skip your own medical check-ups.
5. I feel guilty when I take time for myself while caring for my elderly parent. What can I do?
It’s crucial to understand that taking care of yourself isn’t an act of selfishness. You can only provide effective care if you’re also in good physical and mental health.
6. What should I do if I feel overwhelmed by the responsibilities of caring for my elderly parent?
Reach out to others for help. This could be other family members, friends, or even professional caregivers. Sharing responsibilities can reduce the stress and prevent burnout.
7. How can I spend quality time with my elderly parent?
Engage in activities that both you and your parent enjoy. This could be playing a game, having deep conversations, or participating in a shared hobby. Creating positive memories can help to alleviate the stress of caregiving.
In Conclusion
Taking care of an elderly parent is definitely not an easy job. It consumes your time, energy, and sometimes even money. So remember that it’s alright to take some time for yourself every now and then and reconnect with your own life.
Last but not least, know that your parents appreciate everything you do for them, even if they don’t say it so often. You’re doing great!